#because what are they gonna do after menopause

[unhonestlymirror]

Do you ever look at someone's art and clearly realise they are extremely unhappy with their sex life?

[haveihitanerve]

Toby’s Secret Pocket

Why are you telling the only filipino employee to shut up?

I finally got around to doing commentary for this one, so sorry it took so long, but better late than never right? Hehe. anyway this was pure delight and i hope you enjoy as much as I did:)

“Its gonna have a beginning.” I love you person who does the captions and edits the videos- but what is that spelling… [beggining] y'know what actually thats perfectly fine spelling idk why im being mean you're doing amazing love

Completely useless to the plot but all of my comments are so- luke leaning behind tom to set his drink down and them touching shoulders as Tom glances over to check hes ok before returning attention to AJ, idk why it made me smile, but it did so here it is

“The Seven Sins of the Screaming Menopausals.” i am… SO UPSET they didn't do this one. Soooooo upset. I would pay to see them do this one. I loved every second of Tobys Pocket- but TSSOTSM???? Amazing. Would kill to see them tackle it. Anyway im off topic- continue

Sam’s cackle lugh at the suggestion, Tom’s slow incredulous laugh and Luke hanging his head while AJ just stares like a deer in headlights, trying to figure out how to say “NO!” without screaming it XD

Tom: do we love it? (a man after the audiences heart, i love it) AJ: *no we do not tom don't do this to us* We’re gonna put a pin in that one for a moment Sam: *still cackling* Luke: *still in disbelief*

Sam loves using a fake pike as a prop and i adore it every time

AJ and Tom my fav duo(they’re all my fav duos but rn I’ve picked them specifically) idk what they’re discussing on the sidelines but they’re adorable

I love how Luke started out speaking with a voice he tends to use for his female characters and then realize “wait i’m toby” and has now switched to be a male voice XD

“Thats right. Nobody knows that this shirt’s actually got a propellor in it.” Tom and AJ laughing in sync and wholly mother of gods Sam’s impression of a propellor carrying him a little bit higher is insanely good

“All of my products are tailor made” *said with flourish* “I know. You're a tailor” *said with sass* lol Luke thought he could get the upper hand

Luke’s face of disappointment in his fellow mates will never not be funny XD

And Sam’s joy because even though he cant see Luke’s face, he knows its being made and is enjoying being a lil shit lmaoo

“Let me rephrase!” ooooh the glare in that sentence XD

“All of my products are bespoke.” …. define please. 

“Smoke meth.” why is sam always a crackhead, genuine question. Also, are pipes a frequent tool for meth smoking? I mean i figure its possible but-... im getting off topic lets move along-

“I just love to watch you work Toby.” ok, so is this romance? “And i loooove to watch you smoke that meth.” Both Sam and Luke and Tom laughing, brilliant- and im assuming that means yes romance?

Audience: *oohs and ahhs* Sam:... woOw!

“...-Or the superintendent of the school board-” Luke lifting a finger to stop Sam because what did he just say and then dropping it again when Sam still has more to say idk why but it tickles my brain the right way lol

Luke: *leans against the wall and crosses his legs like a smooth mf* what was the second *laughs* one you said?

“Comptroller!” “define please!” Sounds like a school spelling bee lmao

Tom’s slow, growing smile as Sam actually succeeds at answering, Luke’s “fuck” face, and Aj just grinning at Luke’s disappointment at not being able to hold something over Sam and himself just waiting to see if Tom agrees because he doesn't have a fucking clue XD

Sam’s smug, and yet thankful smile as people appreciate his nerd 😭 such a cutie

“Don't cheer over the end of the definition!” Fourth wall breaks, we love- also Sam dropping his head to laugh, and Tom also chuckling(AJ’s too out of frame to see but I’m sure he enjoyed Luke’s quip too)

“Give him an excuse to peter out like that!” Luke reallllyyy wishes he would have messed up lol

Sam looking at Luke expectantly when he steps closer again like “do you want me to continue you lil shit? I know my stuff” 

“You got manhattan-” “Alright alright!” Luke’s done testing him lmaoo and sam still keeps going XD

“You're keeping me on tenterhooks like a piece of sirloin!” Loving these weird Southern analogies lol(unironically, i have actually heard these sentences being used💀)

I just cant get over how Tom and AJ are fully invested, they’re following Luke with their eyes and head, nodding along, Tom is watching and smiling like a proud dad while AJ looks like one of those really interested fans who wants to puzzle out all the hidden meanings and plot devices before the end(even tho luke doesn't even know them yet lmaoo)

“Don cicicio.” Tom and Aj’s reluctant chuckles- they did not want to find his joke amusing and Sam’s overly dramatic smack to the wall

Idk why but Luke’s elegant twirl to look at Sam- theres absolutely nothing to it but i love it so much- i rewound and watched it about four times lol

“In new york city.” “whats wrong with our boutique here in ArkAhnsas?” Sam had to clarify quickly his accent lmaoo

“Its good, but its small, and Im so misunderstood!” oooh dramatic luke!

“Woo that is one small man!” It isn't a sfth play without a short joke lol

I reallllyyyy wanna know what Tom and Aj’s side conversation was about😭

Also luke fighting a smile the way he does after every short joke gives me life

Tom whispering something to Aj that makes him shake his head and scrunch his face- i would kill to know what was said omg

“I was dabbing my brow-” Luke gets intensely close and Sam flinches away LMAOOO

Luke moving away smoothly because he knows the next words will not be kind XD

“Im a virgin” LMAOOO

Tom’s frowned smiling face of “really sam?” lmaoo loveeee

Lukes face omfg XD

“Deflowered me on that date” sorry- the first date??!?!??!? Ok…

“Thats right. I picked you like the last dandelion of the season-” SAM! (also Tom’s raised eyebrow and head shake of “oh god” is ICONIC)

“And i blew your seed all over the field-” SAMUEL! Omg… (i was watching this with my friend and we both screamed “AJ!!! TOM!! SOMEBODY PLEASE END THE SCENE!!)(spoiler alert: they did not)

Luke struggling to remain poker faced, Sam breaking halfway through his sentence and looking over at AJ and Tom both in pride and shame, Tom shaking and nodding his head in “yeah no sam come on…” also i assume prior to that he explained??? To aj what was said or smth idk they were talking- again i wanna knowwww what was being said but sigh

“I cant give away the secrets of my clients.” Smooooooth Luke, very smooth way of avoiding having to come up with the plot XD

“Not even to your wife?” oh hello you're female???? Ok… we stan

“Not even to your loving, bumptious, meth-smoking wife?” LMAOOO adoreee and both of them breaking because of it too 😭

“I was in trouble the day i met you” OOOOOHHH!!! Smooth sam. Very smooth wow

Luke’s turn to look at him and Sam’s smug smirk ahhhhh 

Tom, finally sick of not being included lol: *walks in like the hunchback and a turtle???* somehow i see a turtle idk

Sam, getting ready to be emotional lovers with Luke; Im- Tom: *the most raspy, old person voice he can summon* good afternoon Sam, well there go my plans: ok…

“I believe you have a package for me.” Luke fighting a smile, focusing, moving to grab the pants, unsure, doubling back around to look at Tom, curious and also thrown off, waves hand in front of his face LMAOOO

Luke: *very intruiged* are- are you- are you blind? Tom: what a man can or cannot see depends very much on the quality of light with which he is dealing Damn that was poetic- also is he trying to say he’ll be like… sneaky about it? Like if you're discreet ill be discreet, i don't see anything?? Idk but Luke’s expression kills me

Idk who Sam is communicating with in the crowd but its hella cute

“You will receive your payment!....” *silence* its so bad Luke turns around and looks at Sam for help- helppppp

AJ now also sick of not being in scenes and become Tom’s bodyguard lol

Sam confused and laughing at AJ’s just random wandering while Tom and Luke have a scene XD

Sam leaning forward to try and make eye contact with AJ to ask “wtf?” because hes so confused lmaooo

Aj just barely smiling back and just not responding

Tom didn't know he was there helppppppp XD

Tom’s pat pat on AJ’s chest 😭🫠

“Hot diggity darn!” Sam ending the scene before Tom can do one of his just spewing nonsense until someone gets the hint lol- and the way he and aj do a lil dance of who sits where 😭

“Chief i gotta speak to you right now!” AJ’s depressed stand up because he wants to be in a scene and knows hes the one who has to get up, but also he doesn't want to lmao

Luke’s lean forward- ready to join the scene, doubting himself- then going “fuck it” is iconic

AJ starting strong with the New York accent to lay the scene, y'know sometimes they do subtle things like that that the audience doesn't even register- i didn't until just now(my second time watching) and its just because im writing commentary and so i know what was already previously said- hes establishing the New York police department for the arkansas business deal and it flew right over my head the first time- anyway they're really good at the whole subtly expanding the plot and providing context clues for each other that we don't understand but they do ok im going insane resume-

“Would it be better if there were three of us in your office?” Tom saw an opportunity and he took it, we stan

Sam giving up entirely, Luke just laughing and aj keeping a surprisingly straight face- but i've actually noticed that Tom and AJ tend to be the “chaos kings” and will not break whenever the other person pulls something out of their ass because if they take it seriously it makes it worse for the others on stage lol and thats the sort of chaos camaraderie i adore

“Constable doohickey” what a great name Luke, thanks “Well fucking great! Thank you for that!” If you cant hear the way he says it it almost sounds like a genuine thank you lol

“And I was just here because I couldn't work out how to use the door!” Tom I love you, AJ doing chaos camaraderie again, Sam and Luke laughing again

“I need to get on you boys more!” be stricter aj. The words are be stricter. But ok. Interesting word choice..

“Woah!” Sam outright saying it, Luke spinning in a circle with a concerned and confused look on his face lol, and TOM LAUGHING OMG!!!! Its brief but he hears what AJ says- raises his eyebrows and lets out a quick snicker before returning to his mind empty stare lol- also he and AJ share a lil soft laugh together a second later too ahhhh they’re so cute

Tom raising his hand 😭 cutieeee

“Ju-just go through the door!” AJ finally broke, brilliant XD and Tom smiling at his own brilliance i loveeee

“Well actually, it goes both ways” NO. IT DOESN'T. THERES NO SUCH THING AS A TWO WAY DOOR LUKE- i need to calm down

Ajs disappointed and tired chief face rubbing is glorious actually lol

Luke and Sam just watching quietly with smiles as Tom fucking obliterates the original meaning of the scene lmaooo

Tom, seeing that his messing around has kinda diverged the plot and the others might be a tad annoyed: we’re gonna cut all this out in the edit right? Random audience member, full of joy and hope: yeah! Bold words to say Tom, and I fear they did not come true

“Wait you mean it was open- ahh…” Sam almost rips his hair out lmaooo while AJ is so gentle and treats Tom like a small child, awww they’re so cute

Tom wanting to be off stage but now hes in the scene sitting down so he has to maintain the “eyes open, mind blank” face lmaoo

Luke looking between AJ and Sam with such delight to see where they take the plot gives me such joy

“Tony the tailor?” Aj feels like that doesn't sound right but he cant really say anything. “Tony the tailor.” Sam sees no problems. “Heeeees great!” Tom is subtly trying to tell them they fucked up XD

SAM FIGHTING HIS SMILE IS SOOO CUTE

And tom sees and makes eye contact, grins wider and even gives a thumbs up like “yeah that was good huh?” AHHHH

Luke cant let the misnaming go on any longer lmaoo “where you guys talking about TOBY the tailor?” the way Tom’s smile fades when Luke says this makes me think that maybe he also didn't know it was toby lmaoo “cause im pretty sure it was toby.” 

Sam looking to Aj for help, aj just staring back blanking because he is renowned for his lack of name remembrance XD

Luke’s excited jumps when he got it right over Sam lol

“Fuck you doohickey!” Sam’s smile at his immense joy, tom and aj amused

“I fucked your wife!” I feel like thats uncalled for somehow…

AJS FACE!!!! COMPLETELY FLABBERGASTED DID NOT SEE THAT COMING XD

“OK! I need order in my police department!” the stilted movements are perfect *chefs kiss*

“Theres a reason nobody trusts us anymore ok?” “Its-its it-its” “SHUT UP!!” Aj has patience, but its slowly worn thin lmaoo

“I was just gonna say its the racism.. Its not-” AJ UNSURE OF HOW TO DEAL WITH THAT LMAOOO

His shift to sam, back to tom, slow, annoyed smile, back to sam, nope back to tom “sh-shut up!” as luke loses it in the background and sam just watches the chaos unfold

Nevermind he has to join it- “why are you telling the only filipino employee to shut up?” SAM!!!

Tom’s eyebrow jump at the sentence lmaooo and sams shit eating grin

“The haircuts not helping chief.” and its truly never a show without a bald joke too. Tom’s chuckling to himself and face scrunch to the audience to not laugh XD

“Its toby.” completely breaks sam lol

Luke returning to his seat after having planned to reenter the scene to be a dick to sam again lmaooo

“Hey!” Sam’s defeated glance in Tom’s direction like “wtf now tom leave me alone” lol

“Are you sure you know about the comptrollers?” Luke losing his mind, Sam smiling in “ah shit i gave them an opening and they’ll never let go” and aj laughing 

“But you know the letter b and the letter n. I watch sesame street and they say they’re different letters” thats cold tom, and iconic

Luke’s utter delight and Sam’s utter defeat are PEAK

“Detective-” AJ ending sams suffering the joke finally and moving on XD

“Which one of us are you talking to?” “you.” “ok :)” Despite all the gripes, he cant contain his own lil shit tendencies lol

“He seems to be a fan favorite.” Hes not wrong!

AJ’s lil tongue bite and Tom’s waving as Luke just cackles- delightful

“And ill go see why my wifes been fucking other people-” Sam just wants out lmaooo

“Don- the don is our jurisdiction.” “you've forgotten his name havent you-” “yessss.” AJ is annoyed-answering before sam even finishes to cut him off lmaoo-, Sam is a lil shit, Luke is helping out and not even being a lil shit because its aj and its usual, and tom is just there lol

“I really think I should be in this fucking room.” LMAOOOO smooth way to say “you guys cant keep the story straight damn” lol

“You three-” “you want us three, including him*passive aggressive look to Luke who is already questioning his life choices and why on earth sam would let aj chose because of course he’ll pick yes* to go talk to the tailor?” Its ajs turn to be a lil shit and he is thriving this is his territory XD

“I want to face to face with Don Cicicioo myself.” Tom careful with your words- they will make it come true

Sam gives up, Luke is laughing, Tom is making things worse, and AJ cant stop grinning at the stupidity

Sam prepping meth for his own sanity XD

TOM DOING THE DISAPPOINTED DAD HEAD HANG AND NOSE PINCH

AND LAUGHING

Im noticing so many more things the second time around lol. This is delightful(also im here to point these things out to you guys so you don't have to watch it twice if you don't want to lol- thats literally the only point of these, pointing out cuteness and friendship between these four idiot cuties i just get carried away a lot)

Tom leaning over to check on Sam, then leaning back and scrunching his face at Aj- cutie

“Oh ma god- i think this- this stuffs bad. I just saw a tiny bald man-” AJ cant ever escape lmaooo

Aj laughing, Tom doing his DDHH(disappointed dad head hang) *we laugh so we don't cry core*

Aj and Tom talking off stage again- i think this time they’re debating who goes up first, because Tom points to himself and y'know idk

“Im gonna go and throw up in the bathroom.” “you go do that sweetheart” unironically a very sweet relationship lol

“Oh hello.*i love how the captions clarify its a british accent and aj forces a british accent when hes literally british* im just a local british man.” (they're in arkansas) “me too pip pip!” “alright geezer!” If luke wanted to make life easier for himself he shouldn't make such memorable characters lol

The way Sam and AJ stumble over and clarify each others words is toooo cute. “Or as you call them-” “pants.” “pants.” 

“Actually, theres only space for two!” *he thought he was so clever, also AJ’s smile because he thought that was pretty clever too lol* but oh no no no, its Sam’s payback time. “Ill leave!” “NO!” that no came from the depths of Luke’s soul and there is now a deeply sated fond hatred in him because of that lmaoo

AJ GRINNING, AND TOM LAUGHING TO THE POINT WHERE HE ACTUALLY CLAPS AHHHHH CUTIESSSS

Sam’s proud grin, Luke’s slow turn to look at him, a… idk the proper adjective but y'know the smile he has, and Sam’s little head tilt of “thats what you get fucker” iconic

Luke preparing to speak to the point where it breaks both him and aj lmaooo them bending in sync is too cute

“Hey- hey guys! I made it out of the car!” *proud jimmy* Tom you sweet precious summer child i wanna put you in my pocket awwww

“Chief- i just realized? Why did you come with us?” AJ is giggling too much now, Luke broke him XD “I just- I want- I might as well be part of this! Otherwise Ill have to sit on the side for the rest of the show!” poor baby lol (also the way he sways between all three having to touch them all is too cute)

Growing a suddenly harsher british accent to resume the scene when they literally just had their regular british accents on 😭💀

“I thought you were going to stay in the car!” come on luke! Tom was trying to help! (for once whaaaat who said that?)

“Oh i liked him!” Luke… you make it too easy bb😭

Also toms cute lil chuckle 🫠

“I can bring him back!” AJ’s grin the back “no thats alright-” Luke is done lmaooo

“Come back!” “oooh great!” if anyone could ever say any happier words and mean them any less… i don't believe its possible lol

The entire next bit with luke having to measure himself- when he could chose literally anyone else is iconic XD

“I would come with you but theres a door!” Good point. “Ill cover.” Silence. “I get lonely sometimes.” Luke’s surprised smile and Sam immediately ending the scene lmaoo

“The comptroller.” his proud smile… tt tt tt. XD

Aj really wants to be in a scene, becoming a cat, adorable 

[attention seeking meow]

“I've got a new… cat.” Aj regrets his choices but hes committed now lol

Sam’s concern but keeps petting anyway. “Its so sweaty.” Aj and luke’s laugh🫠

AJ rubbing his head on Sam’s shirt LMAOOOO

And luke loosing it, beautiful paired with Sam’s disgust is just gorgeous

“I see you went with one of those egyptian hairless ones.” yet another bald joke, necessary and glorious as always XD

Even Sam is surprised lol. Luke literally throwing his head back in laughter and Tom’s pride at his skilled joke XD

“Its a very muscular cat.” awww tom felt bad and needed to say something nice, precious

“We go to the gym together.” do they actually? Because that’d be adorable

Idk why Aj starts smiling randomly and almost laughs, but hes so pretty

The ways sams arm is just resting on ajs back and aj really just wanted a comfortable surface to nap lol, eyes closed just resting against sam- brb im gonna go cry

“Its a fun wordplay.” It truly is Tom i love when his lil english nerd comes out <333

“Ahhhhh.” Sam’s scream of concern thats really just a soft sound of confusion because what did Tom do

“Meow.” [concerned meow] that was actually a flawless cat sound aj wow

“But fro those thirty seconds!” why does he sound like an infomercial helppp “you're gonna have one hell of a ride!” AJ both laughing and having to be a concerned cat is wonderful

SAM LICKING AJS HEAD WHAAAAT 

I don't know who’s more disgusted- sam or aj lol. Or the audience honestly

“Anyone who thinks they comptrol anything around here-” thats funny wordplay tom- i see you

“And ill make sure you're looked after.” His sloow reach for AJ’s head and just… weirdly, pushing backwards against it 😭

Aj’s slow smirk and then utter and complete break as Tom licks it 😭

Luke trying to start a new scene and Tom just… disgusted XD

[the face of a man who regrets his previous decision] so so so real

Aj laughing when he notices XD

“Why’d you have hair product in?” The genuine confusion- plus Luke’s complete break, Aj’s bend forward in laughter, and I assume Sam’s agreement because he too licked the head 😭 thats a sentence i never thought id write…

“Why is there guilt in your eyes… toby?” Sam’s proud smirk lmaoo

“For remembering a name?” even Sam is shocked that got cheers XD Tom and Aj both laughing at Luke’s outrage. “How low is the fucking bar?” 

“You forget i remembered it while really high on meth!” fair point y'know

Luke and TOM laughing, plus toms DDHH

“Rrrrrrrrrrreaching into your brain.” I appreciate the hand motions to go with it, and Tom’s complete break, snorting and folding, plus a puff up of the cheeks to try and stop the laugh and failing XD

“Im not allowed to cross state lines.” Tom’s pure enjoyment is giving me life, and Luke’s finger wagging of “don't you fucking do this to me sam” is wonderful

I adore every time the boys have to sit down and shuffle its so cute omfg-

“You too Jimmy. Your internship is over.” damn. The audience booing AJ for his choices is iconic and craaazy and i am HERE for it!

Luke also losing it is a nice touch XD

Not a single one of them can fight their grins and it is precious

AJ CLOSING THE CURTAINS AND FLIPPING THE AUDIENCE OFF AGHHHHHH

“I guess even though i made it myself-” THE CROWD IS ABOUT TO RIOT OH GODS AJ RUNNNNN

Why did they randomly start barking? I don't know. I really don't. Great questions. Anyway. 

“There was a second door????” [distressed jimmy] distressed sam too XD

Sam slouching to be the same height as luke😭

Sam and Luke caressing Aj’s cheek with the same??? Hand??kinda…

“Explain yourself!” “i just did!” their shared break ahhh

Luke abusing his power to force Sam to do his hand gestures XD

“I recon you've gotta send-*starts grinning because ohohoho tom you’ll get your wish alright* best officer.” 

“Stop! Him” Sam: *accidentally smacks him* Sorry:(

Tom’s screech as Sam gets revealed- but the way Aj immediately rushes to cradle and soothe him 😭

“MITOSIS!” no ok, the history nerd and english nerd are fine but don't throw biology at me nuh uh i cant deal with this😭

Apparently neither can Aj lol but for a different reason XD

“Its the process of cell division.” y'know as much as they shame him, they all do immediately tend to clarify things he doesn't understand and it is quite cute lol

“Son,” Tom: *immediately jolts into action* Dad? :) Sam and Luke slowly losing it together XD

AJ: shhhh, don't let anybody know about it Tom: *increasingly more incredulous* DAD?!?! I DIDN'T KNOW! Aj: *confused* Luke: *trying to be un lil shit* you didn't? The resemblance- Tom: i've been looking my whole life! Tom: *squealing and shaking* DADDY?!?!?!? Luke and Sam: *looking at each other in, should we join or wait or end???* AJ: *now stressed and confused* I swear we had this conversation earlier on! Tom: *shakes head and entire body* UHHHH!!! I guess I was distracted *no i wasn't but ill make it easier for you jj lol*

“Son!” “daddy!” they're so cute😭

“Son!” “HIIIII DADDY!” sobbing-

“If you're gonna take that Don down single-handed[ly] in a scene that goes on for about three to four minutes, just you and him *sam you ass XD* *everyone smirking at that, even tom* you're gonna need this. Its the strongest meth i know.” “Ok :) !” Injects it right away Sam: thats not- *how would you know sam… how would you know👀*

Oh yay we get Aj the bodyguard again!

AJ: *dies dramatically* Tom: *nahhh fuck that* wailing Robbie, I told you not to do that anymore! Luke: *dies* AJ: *stumbles back on stage* sorry heh. I just had a moment, I apologize- Tom: *surprised he went along with it, even though duh ofc he did lol* oh- *eyebrow raise of delight and mocking* You’re okay? *laughs* Luke: *dying*” AJ: Im totally fine!

Round two: AJ: OH NO!! *dies dramatically, again* Tom: *ready to make it dramatic* wailing robbie come on now… Wailing Robbie? Wailing Robbie whats going on?- AJ: *fuck you Tom I can do it too* ahhhh just got you there! Didn't i?” Tom: *annoyed smile, but admittedly proud* yeah… Luke: *dying* Sam: *mildly, annoyedly, amused lol*

Round Three: Aj: anyway I’ll uh- Sam: Oh god… Aj and Tom: *laugh* Luke: *sits like a majestic diva and chuckles* Tom: go on then answer the door! Sam: *if he doesn't actually die this time i will kill him* Tom and Luke: *anticipation and laughter* Aj: *dies silently because the last two times didn't go so well lmaooo*

ITS TOM AND TOM’S SOLO SCENE YAY

“STOP IN THE NAME OF THE LAAAAAW!!!!” get it Jimmy

Sam and Luke losing it XD

“I've got… TEN FINGERS!!!! :)” perfect response Tom, truly

Tom fixing his shirt everytime to switch between characters and Sam’s cackle of appreciation when he notices- which makes Tom smile a lil(also lil face scrunch to not laugh)- is adorable

“You look out of breath son. You sure you wouldn't like to calm down and speak more quietly?” “NO!” Tom just out here making life harder for himself huh lmao

“I THINK!-” [jimmy's well articulated thoughts] AJ and Luke bursting out laughing and Sam’s grin- truly Tom, a work of genius this move, honestly XD

“No get it all out.” [jimmy continues] wow hes got a lot to say “but wai- oh you're not done.” [jimmy has so much to say]

Luke sneaking in the back and Tom’s side eye to the audience because he heard it, but knowing Luke it could be anything and he has no idea what to do lol

Luke licking the knife is so hot for no reason- also idk the time stamps of these, but im assuming Aj did it first in Caesar and Juliet anyway off topic-

Aj’s fold at Luke's escape is tooooo cute XD

Aj the emotional support cat is back

“Ill do it as soon as I get out of this-” perfectttttt ending Tom omfg-

Luke’s lil back pat to Tom in “haha i thought that was funny well done” and Aj’s pat to him too awww

AND SCENE!!!! That was… a wild ride and one I enjoyed very very very much. Chaos and delight and mocking and enjoying each others craft and what they do. Iconic. So sorry it took so long, but better late than never right? I hope… anyway ill start working on Jingle Boys soon and hope you enjoyed!

@snek-of-eden @dawn-speckled @flamingbluepanda -i finally did it, hope you enjoyed<333

[louis--wifey]

WTTT Incorrect Quotes but it's just things that people in my real life have said

It's so long I'm so sorry 😭😭

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Illinois, cleaning his shoes: Last time I wore these shoes I got apple butter on them..

Ohio: I remember that song. *singing* Apple butter shoes, boots with the fur.

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Florida: *yapping*

New York, who forgot his phone in the car: I'm going to get my phone so I can ignore you for a minute.

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South Carolina: Georgia and I are dressing at Waylon and Willie for Halloween!

North Carolina: I could be Johnny Cash and just lay there in a coffin... *To the tune of Hurt by NIN covered by Johnny Cash. Johnny Cash impression.* I hurt myself, today

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Washington, helping Nevada with his math homework: Let's break it down

Nevada: I'll break it down *gets off of his chair and starts break dancing*

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Kansas: That sounded like a car commercial...

Oklahoma: I can write car commercials all day long.

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Maryland: Nothing says hot like harmonica!

(I have no context for this btw. My professor said it a couple weeks ago and I tuned into the conversation as soon as he said it and I have no idea what was happening before hand)

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Michigan: Hey, Ohi-

Ohio: And all of the sudden I heard an irritating, grading voice. And it was yours.

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Illinois: My grandma has chickens, and she's obsessed with chickens.

Minnesota: Tell your grandma to call me.

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Arizona: If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go lock myself in the cooler.

Utah: Bang on the door if you need anything.

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Florida: *lands on go to jail in Monopoly* Noooo in jail again!?

Gov: That's something we need to talk about. If you keep driving so fast you're going to end up in jail.

Florida: Oh I thought this was gonna be about me puking in the county jail parking lot...

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California: What three characters have omniscience?

Florida: Your mom

California: What four characters have omniscience?

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Colorado: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Wisconsin: FOOD TRUCK!

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Missouri: Guess what my dream car is

Indiana: A Lamborghini

Missouri: No

Indiana: A Kia Soul

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Washington: New York with the leadership skills!

New York: I just know where I'm going -_-

Washington: Say "I'm New York and I'm a baddie"

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Texas: Can you count change? *Looks down at the change California gave him* You can!

California: I'm great at counting change, I used to do it for fun when I was little. Because I didn't have any friends.

Texas: Pfff-

~~~~

Oregon: A Monster a day keeps the straightness away.

~~~~

Nevada: You look like a clown.

California: Am I a pretty clown?

~~~~

Gov, to Louisiana and Florida: I would stop whining so much if you two stopped drinking alcohol.

California: Sometimes your whining makes me wish I liked alcohol.

~~~~

Florida: Gov, I'm helping!

Alabama: By... Making it harder?

Florida: Yep!

~~~~

Florida, singing: Everybody was kung fu fighting

New Jersey, to the tune Kung Fu Fighting: Everybody should shut the fuck up

~~~~

Washington's cat: *killing a bug.*

Washington: "Rip in half! Rip in half! Rip in half! When I say "beat" you say "that ass" Beat! *Long pause, points to Oregkn* Fill in for him!

Oregon: *slowly turns around in his spinny chair*

Washington: Aw, come on! You can say donkey instead. Beat!

*silence*

Oregon: No.

Washington: Fine. *dances out of the room* K-I-C-K-Y-O-A-S-S Oh yeeessss!

~~~~

Maryland: *playing a cheap toy recorder on a make-shift stage*

Massachusetts: MORE COWBELL!!

~~~~

California: I just love feeling like a menopausal woman.

~~~~

Oregon, sick: The crystal ladies said if you got sick after the eclipse, it's your ancestors banishing evil from your body.

Idaho: They're praying the gay away

~~~~

South Dakota: Wish me luck in war

Minnesota: You're not going to war, you're asking for a box

South Dakota: It's the same thing, damn it!

~~~~

Alaska: Penny for your thoughts?

Hawaii: I don't have any pennies.

Alaska: I don't have any thoughts!

~~~~

Louisiana: We can bring the baguette to and beat California with it...

Florida: Or Utah.

~~~~

Gov: If you could make any crime legal what would it be?

New York, Florida and Louisiana at the same time: Arson!

Gov: *mortified expression*

~~~~

Iowa, about chicken: Are you a thigh person?

Nebraska: I like legs... ThEy TrIeD tO pUt Me On ThE cOvEr Of VoGuE bUt My LeGs WeRe ToO LONGGGGG!

~~~~

Colorado: I need a stick!

California: I need a boyfriend, your point?

Colorado: ...Not that kind of stick.

~~~~

Oregkn: In high school my favorite past time was kissing boys.

Washington: *turns to California* Is that your favorite past time too?

~~~~

Texas: Why aren't bananas called yellows?

Florida: Because then Gwen Stefani couldn't use it in her song.

Louisiana: She'd just have to spell it different: This shit is yellows! Y-E-L-L-O-W-S!

~~~~

California: He's gay and he committed suicide.

New York: He's you... Don't commit suicide, please.

California: I WILL BECOME A MUSICAL!

New York: NOOO DO NOT BECOME A MUSICAL!

~~~~

North Carolina: I seriously hate you sometimes.

South Carolina Aww I love you too!

~~~~

Vermont: You wanna know the biggest dingus I know?

New Hampshire: You?

~~~~

Wisconsin: You're a yeasty beer

Illinois: You're a zesty beer

Wisconsin: Yeah well, your light in the loafers!

~~~~

Arizona: *says something dumb*

Nevada: Shaking my as- shaking my head.

~~~~

New York: *takes a drink of my pumpkin spice latte* Oh, that's delightful!

California: Look who's a white woman now?!

[later]

California: You basic white woman!

New York: I don't wanna talk about it...

~~~~

Louisiana: *throws a packet of French dressing at Florida, in a French accent* French

Florida: AAAAA IT'S FRENCH!!!

~~~~

Florida: Oh, I thought you were committing arson without me

Gov: If I ever decide to commit arson, I'll call you

~~~~

Florida: Ah yes, my favorite crime, trespassing. I'm joking... it's not my favorite crime

Georgia: What is your favorite crime?

Florida: Arson!

~~~~

Arizona: Finally a good song

New Mexico: Then why do you keep playing bad ones?

~~~~

*Either someone brought up Pedro Pascal*

California: He's the daddiest of daddies.

Texas: Don't say that ever again.

~~~~

Maine: There are more animals on the planet than humans and just think you could have been born a crab, but you were born a human"

Maryland: I wish I was a crab, then I could be crabby all day long

Maine: I'm all ready crabby all day long

Maryland: Yeah but if you were a crab you could crawl around and pinch people *walks away sideways with hands held like pinchers*

~~~~

Alaska: Why are you getting cologne

Hawaii: I want to smell like a masc lesbian.

~~~~

California: I've had morning sickness for the past five years

Florida: Are you pregnant-

~~~~

Washington: You can choose what you eat, whether it's vegetables, meat, or ass.

Nevada: *dying laughing* That threw me off guard.

~~~~

New York: PA, your turn to tell a word that means something bad

Pennsylvania: Would you consider emotional manipulation bad?

New Jersey: Yeah, I mean no, it turns me on

Pennsylvania: I guess my mom will really turn you on then

~~~~

Tennessee: Don't panic but there's a spider on your-

Kentucky: *Proceeds to scream bloody murder*

~~~~

Virginia: *sniffs bread.*

Virginia: "It's sourdough."

~~~~

New York: You know I'm insane, right?

California: I'm aware, but I don't care. It's one of your redeeming qualities.

[mariacallous]

JD Vance agreed with the notion that raising grandchildren was “the whole purpose of the postmenopausal female,” an unearthed 2020 podcast shows.

Vance also seemed to concur when the host suggested that having grandparents help raise children was a “weird, unadvertised feature of marrying an Indian woman.”

It's the latest in comments from the Republican nominee for vice presdident about women and "traditional" roles that have drawn ire. Vance has faced intense criticism in recent weeks for previous sexist comments, including his remarks about "cat ladies."

Now, his appearance on ThePortal podcast with host Eric Weinstein in April 2020 has been thrust back into the limelight Vance spoke about his wife’s Indian family, noting that they emigrated to the US about a year before his wife, Usha Vance, was born. He said at the time, her parents were “devoted” to Usha and their grandchild as well as to “future grandchildren.”

The couple has three children, born in 2017, 2020 and in 2021.

“You can sort of see the effect it has on him to be around them like they spoil him,” he said of his first child. “There's sort of all the classic stuff that grandparents do to grandchildren, but it makes him a much better human being to have exposure to his grandparents.”

He added: “And the evidence on this is like super clear.”

“That’s the whole purpose of the postmenopausal female in theory,” Weinstein said at the time.

“Yes,” Vance agreed.

“When your child was born, did your in-laws, and particularly your mother-in-law, show up in some huge way?” Weinstein asked Vance.

“She lived with us for a year,” former President Donald Trump’s running mate noted.

“I didn't know the answer to that. So that's a weird, unadvertised feature of marrying an Indian woman,” Weinstein responded.

“It’s in some ways, the most transgressive thing I've ever done against sort of the hyper-neo-liberal approach to work and family,” Vance said. “My wife had this baby seven weeks before she started the clerkship, [she’s] still not sleeping any more than an hour and a half in a given interval. And her mom just took a sabbatical. She's a biology professor in California, just took a sabbatical for a year and came and lived with us and took care of our kid for a year.”

He added that it was “painfully economically inefficient.”

“Why didn't she just keep her job, give us part of the wages to pay somebody else to do it?” he asked. “That is the thing that the hyper-liberalized economics wants you to do. The economic logic of always prioritizing paid wage labor over other forms of contributing to a society is to me ... a consequence of a sort of fundamental liberalism that is ultimately gonna unwind and collapse upon itself.”

“It's the abandonment of a sort of Aristotelian virtue politics for a hyper-market-oriented way of thinking about what's good and what's desirable,” he added. “If people are paying for it and it contributes to GDP and it makes the economic consumption numbers rise, then it's good, and if it doesn't, it's bad ... that's sort of the root of our political problem.”

The Director of Rapid Response for Kamala Harris, Ammar Moussa, wrote on X: “I’m sorry - who is out here just out here talking about the ‘postmenopausal female’ and their role in society?”

Democratic Illinois Congressman Sean Casten added: “Are you a post-menopausal woman? Did you quit your job to look after your grandkids? Because if you didn’t, you are not meeting your ‘whole purpose’ according to JD Vance.”

Vance has faced criticism for a number of unearthed comments from his past, most notably telling Fox News host Tucker Carlson in 2021 that the US was being run by “a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own lives and the choices that they’ve made, and so they want to make the rest of the country miserable, too.”

“It’s just a basic fact — you look at Kamala Harris, Pete Buttigieg, AOC [Alexandria Ocasio Cortez] — the entire future of the Democrats is controlled by people without children,” he said. “And how does it make any sense that we’ve turned our country over to people who don’t really have a direct stake in it?”

Harris has two stepchildren and Buttigieg, the transportation secretary, adopted twins in August 2021.

idk, pretty sure the intent is fairly clear *and* we can put election-swaying weight to it!

Also, it's fucking weird to talk like this about people!

[lexa-griffins]

Another idea, Clarke uses Lexa's shower because Lexa insists it's the least she could do for Clarke helping set up her flower bed. After she's done Clarke comes out in just a towel that's a bit too tight and small on her body and leaves very little to Lexa's imagination what's underneath it. Poor Lexa's brain is short circuiting so she may need to take a cold shower right after

Despite the little incident when Clarke comes inside to tell Lexa she's all set, Lexa insists Clarke have dinner with her and that her kid would absolutely love to have Clarke there.

Although Clarke wants to accept it she is awfully dirty so Lexa offers for her to use her shower "by yourself Clarke" which does drag out a low chuckle from Clarke that makes Lexa a little weak in the knees but she accepts it and she's on her way as Lexa goes to Clarke's truck to get her the change of clothes she asked for, leaving it on the couch, not particularly ready to barge into the bathroom as she more than her lesbian heart is ready for.

Lexa barely had time to cook before. Now that she's here, she has so much fun cooking, no matter how small or big. In her excitement over cooking - and having Clarke taste it - she completely forgets to hear for the water being turned off.

"Thanks for getting my clothes, god your shower is fucking heaven"

Lexa wasnt quite ready to hear Clarke voice, making her jumps slightly and then again nearly drop the wooden spoon in her hand and she turns around to gace Clarke, holding a towel that is too small on her side - something Lexa did not think about when she grabbed one that is admittedly intended for her kid - her thigh, the side of her stomach and her boob peaking from the fabric.

She tries not to stare. And she immediately fails. Clarke’s boob looks so fucking close to spilling out Lexa has to stop herself from wishing it does. The side of her tummy and thighs like a painting of scars and stretch marks thst have Lexa hitch to trace them.

Clarke lingers for a moment, knowing damn well Lexa is not paying attention to the smirk on her face, watching her eyes widen and pretty lips part with heavy breaths. Clarke lets her take in whatever she wants before turning.

"I'll make sure to turn the water to cold for you, you sure look like you need a cold shower."

Lexa's mind only registers what Clarke said when the door clothes, making her her scrunch her entire face in annoyance at herself and her lack of self control around Clarke because good god she cannot help herself can she?

She has very little time to question if she should maybe walk in and get back at Clarke by getting naked in front of her before her kid is bursting through the door after soccer practice and getting all excited that Clarke is gonna have dinner with them, anot before he questions his mom about why does she look so red, like, is she alright? Is it menopause?

"I am too young for menopause!"

"🤷‍♂️ it was just a thought mom"

[bforbetterthanyou]

I’m curious…what is your opinion of Henry’s relationship with each of his wves?

Oh my goodness gracious, thank you for this, Anon! (This got ridiculously long so I’m putting it under a cut)

Okay I guess I’ll start with Catherine of Aragon since she never gets to go first…

Hot take (not really) but I don’t think she and Henry had this great romantic love. And, for the record, I think it was mutual. I don’t think either of them loved each other in a romantic way. However, I also don’t think that Henry married her because he was forced to…because who forced him? His father? Yeah, Henry claimed later on that he only married Catherine because it was his father’s “dying wish” (or something to that effect) but we don’t know if that’s actually true and also, Henry denounced the betrothal in 1505 and no one forced him to go through with it regardless. And, certainly, none of the naysayers were forcing him to go through with it. Catherine apologists make so much of Henry uses the “brother’s widow” excuse during the Great Matter and completely gloss over the fact that there were multiple people also citing this as a reason during the period of Catherine’s widowhood.

I think, what it came down to, was that Henry knew that Catherine had been living in wealthy poverty and was maybe not being treated very kindly by his father, and Henry was also dealing with his own poor treatment by his father, and so Henry saw himself as this knight in shining armor rescuing the damsel in distress. Of course, Henry and Catherine had also known each other for almost a decade—it’s hard to know exactly what their relationship was like during those years because I doubt they really interacted much, but if Catherine was kind to him then that would add to why Henry was so okay with ignoring the naysayers. And then, in the early years of their marriage, Henry came to admire and respect her.

Where things get complicated is the issue of their children. I remember once seeing this article Suzannah Lipscomb wrote where she speculated how their marriage would be if Henry, Duke of Cornwall had lived and Suzannah made it out to be that everything was all rainbows and sunshine and she was his beloved wife forever etc etc. That’s great, Suzy, but I really don’t think it’s, at all, realistic. Certainly, if Catherine had had a healthy son who survived, Henry wouldn’t have divorced her even after she hit menopause. But Ithink it’s very optimistic to say their marriage would’ve been perfect. Obviously, losing so many children didn’t help. But, like I said, I don’t think Henry was deeply in love with her, so I think it’s inevitable that he would’ve strayed (I guess is the right word?).

On to Anne (strap in y’all this already way too long answer is gonna get even longer).

So I mentioned how I don’t think Henry was really romantically in love with Catherine. I think that Anne was the first time (and the last time actually) that Henry genuinely, properly, fell in love with someone (sorry Bessie stans…do those exist? Probably…somewhere…I definitely feel like I’ve seen at least one person try to argue that Bessie was the great love of his life). Anyway, yeah I think Henry had all of these grand romantic ideas about himself and he believed himself to be in love with every pretty girl…and then he met Anne and his brain just short-circuited. (And, who can blame him, I mean Anne Boleyn is obviously the most perfect woman whose ever existed, I’m in love with her 😂). In all seriousness, Henry didn’t have the great passionate love with Catherine but he definitely had it with Anne. We could talk about what went wrong in that relationship, but I’ve already stated my opinion on that and almost got run off of Tumblr for it.

So moving on to Jane…

Oh dear. It amazes me how many people still believe Henry’s own propaganda. So, unfortunately, for those of you, it’s very clear to me that Henry never loved Jane at all. He treated her pretty poorly while she was alive. I think she appealed to him because she wasn’t Anne. After she died, he fell head over heels with the idea of her. But that’s about it.

Now, lucky number 4.

I feel like I don’t really need to say much about this one. Henry made his feelings about Anna pretty clear.

I guess I could talk about their post-divorce relationship. What’s sad is that I think Anna could’ve actually been good for him. She comes across as a pretty chill person, but she also enjoyed a lot of the same things that he enjoyed. I think, if Henry had just not done that stupid thing of thinking that he was still 20 years old and that Anna would magically recognize him somehow, then I think they could’ve been brilliant together.

Onto Katheryn number 2.

I feel like this one is pretty self-explanatory. Henry was getting old, he couldn’t exercise like he used to, he had mobility issues, he was becoming obese…and Katheryn made him feel young again. What’s interesting comparing Katheryn and Anne’s downfall—Anne died because she was powerful, Katheryn died because she was powerless.I mean, it’s not insignificant that Katheryn’s downfall took months while Anne’s took just a few weeks. Obviously, the suspicion of Katheryn committing adultery was embarrassing for him, but she stuck around so long under house arrest because the only real threat Katheryn posed was to Henry’s ego.

Yee-haw, it’s Kathryn Parr (any Rex Factor fans out there?)

This one I also feel like is pretty self-explanatory. By this point, Henry has alienated and killed everyone who ever cared about him so, naturally, he’s feeling pretty lonely. What I find most interesting is that Kathryn was older and more mature and, obviously learned. I think with Jane, especially, and to a lesser-extent, Katheryn, Henry was kind of over intelligent women who could stand up to him. But I get the sense that, after Katheryn’s execution, he kind of got tired of the subservient wife. I think Henry actually preferred intelligent, feisty women, but things had gone so horribly wrong with Anne that he wanted the opposite. But then he quickly got bored of the opposite. Obviously, at this point in Henry’s life he’s really not interested in anyone standing up to him or trying to impose their opinions on him, but he still wanted someone he could have a conversation with. And Kathryn, bless her, was clever enough to match him intellectually without pushing the boundaries too much.

Wow, this got so insanely long. I’ll put it under a cut so it doesn’t clog up anyone’s feed.

But, you know, when I really spell it out like this, it just emphasizes how frustrating it is when all the wives get lumped together and the last few even get largely ignored. Because, for all of them, their circumstances for becoming Henry’s wife were completely different, and all of their relationships with him are completely different. People act like him having six wves was inevitable or that his choices were completely random. On one level, I can understand why people lump them together in this neat “Six Wives” package but doing that completely ignores the fact that they were individuals, not just a part of this rotating door of arbitrarily chosen women.

[everydayfrimmel]

August 22, 2024

"Chalupa" 500 words, modern AU, dating app-ish setup?

She is on her third Chalupa.

Himmel has paid for all three.

This is the most wonderful development he could have imagined.

See, Himmel doesn't see much of a point in dating apps for finding love or anything. Most people who sign up for dating apps aren't looking for love the way he would want it, so it doesn't bother him much that this girl is hopelessly awkward, was forced to sign up by her twelve-year-old sister and their adoptive mother, and is more concerned with where she is going to get more Chalupas than she is with getting to know her date. It's no loss.

Because in a world where the dating app is completely useless for its intended purpose, the best use it could possibly be put to, in Himmel's eyes, is for finding interesting people.

Interesting however. Smart-interesting. Good-at-conversation interesting. Has-a-weird-job interesting. Things like that. People who are fun to meet even if he never sees them again (and, usually, once they realize he has no interest in taking them home unless it is to make nachos and watch B-movies with a near-stranger, he does not).

And Frieren is interesting for three reasons:

For her reticence, obviously.

For suggesting Taco Bell as the location of a first date, specifying explicitly that she was only going to get her family to stop asking and that she might as well get Taco Bell out of it.

And for being so passionately in love with something as objectively awful as a Taco Bell Chalupa.

A girl who could love a Chalupa, he thinks, could love anything, and he's somewhat ridiculously enamored with the fact that she can.

"It's questionable whether or not it can even be called food," she says coolly between bites, after she notices him watching her. (His own Crunchwrap Supreme, it must be said, is long gone.) "But I find it intriguing."

"Intriguing enough to eat three of them?"

Her eyes narrow. "I have a naturally high metabolism."

"No, I mean, you must really like them. Is all I meant."

"Oh." She pauses to consider. "I suppose."

She supposes?

He is beginning, charmed as he is, to get a picture of why her family was so desperate for her to land a date.

Quite frankly, he doesn't know how she hasn't already.

Idiots on dating apps love a girl with quirks.

(He is one such idiot.)

"I'm not gonna lie, Frieren," he says, "I kinda can't do Chalupas."

"Entirely understandable." She daintily licks some meat juice (is it even meat?) off her pinkie finger. "Like I said, whether they should be called food is highly questionable."

"But, uh…all the more power to ya…?"

"I consider it my duty to use my naturally high metabolism to the fullest before menopause."

He almost chokes on a sip of his Baja Blast.

"Menopause? Aren't you twenty-two?"

"And slowly creeping towards my middle age."

What a strange, strange girl this Frieren is.

This won't be the last Chalupa he buys her.

[simptasia]

How did girls and Charlie handle their periods while on the island? Were there any pads/tampons available? Or was it all lost or in small quantities?

I've thought about this!

First of all, yes I do think there are pads and tamps on the island, as there would have been plenty in assorted luggage. This program just didn't think this needed to be addressed on a show that was about survival for it's first,,, half a season? Indeed, in all of LOST there are two acknowledgements that periods exist:

Claire saying she's late when she's taking a pregnancy test

Kate going from suspecting she's pregnant to being absolutely sure she isn't, implying she got her period

And I suppose in between eps, Sun must have been late for hers in order for her to suspect she was pregnant

Overall, LOST only acknowledges periods when it absolutely has to, and even then is rather hush hush about it

Anyways, I think post crash, Sawyer did his little magpie thing and gathered up everything he could get his greedy hands on. This included period supplies. Then as time went on, more and more ladies came to him for supplies. And this freaked him out, so he was like "oh fuck this" and literally threw the bag of bleedy supplies into Jack's arms. And from then on, it's Jack who's in charge of that. And he's entirely not weird about it, because he's a fucking surgeon

I don't care what goes on in reality, I choose to believe that a man who has literally had his giant hands in people's spine pasta, wouldn't be too bothered by the fact that vaginas expel meat pulp

The first 4 seasons covers 3 and a half months so thats about three periods for every uterus having person on the island. However! There are varying circumstances at play here!

Let's go thru this, character by character:

Shannon: Dies a month and a bit into this, so she had time for one period, maybe two depending on when in the month she has 'em

Claire: She was pregnant until November 20th. So no periods during that time frame. After which, she would have had very heavy post pregnancy bleeding, but not for very long, because the magic of the island would have made her body recover much quicker than regular people. Then she would've continued periods somewhere in december onwards. And for three years she was all on her lonesome but she had access to the survivor's abandoned camp, so she would have used up the last of the bleedy supplies until eventually running out and. free bleeding. Fucking hell

Sun: Got pregnant very early into the survivor's time there. And gave birth after they left. So she had no periods on the island

Kate: Probably had time for a complete three periods, with at least one that she was a little late for

Charlie: Mostly doesn't get periods, like, his are incredibly irregular. This leads to him believe that his T patches make good enough birth control. He is wrong and stupid. So maybe he bled on the island, maybe he didn't. If he did, he would have never in his life asked Sawyer for period supplies. He'll bleed into his crotch socks

Ana Lucia and Libby: Did not have access to the Sawyer and later Jack controlled Period Supplies. Because everything was worse for the tailies. Also I think being shot 4 times in the uterus means Ana Lucia can't get periods anymore. Tho as I typed that I realised the Island could easily fix that. The Island fixed Jin's balls. So there's a thought for ya: Ana Lucia getting periods on the island and being like,,, what the fuck. what the Fuck. cuz that's a literal miracle

Charlotte: Was only on the island for 16 days and I'm gonna be nice and say she wasn't on her period during that time. Because 1. She was bleeding enough and 2. To spare her the indignity of asking for pads from people who don't like her :(

Juliet: Girl lived in a cult commune for 3 years, so she's good. Had time for maybe one period with the losties, and for sure Jack would hold open his jackpack and proudly display the tampies for her

Final notes: Fair to assume Rose is post menopausal. Woe be to Alex when she got her first period, not due to lack of supplies (again, cult commune) but because it made Ben even more insane. Annd finally, pour one out for Danielle Rousseau. 16 x 12 = 192. Give or take

Oh and the dozen or so background ladies of the survivors too. So either there was a lot of supplies or they run out maybe after the second month? I dunno man, either way Sawyer got overwhelmed

Side note: my Mum liked to point out when ladies tummies are bloated in shows because that means the actresses were on their periods (their voices would get a tad whinier too). She did this a lot when we watched LOST. There ain't no rest for the fertile

Tho, if you also wanna be weird and take notice of this, Kate's tummy isn't bloated in season 6 due to period, Evie was literally pregnant

Just some trivia for ya

Thank you for your time

[cherrystrawberrie]

doctors in doctor shows are like "You came here for a headache but i see you are leaning a little far to your left which makes me think you have back problems u might have scoliosis come lets do a test" but irl they let my mom go through 2 pregnancies without ever mentioning PCO's until 5 years after my sister was born and being like u know what your womb is full of cysts we're gonna have to take it out and then proceeded to leave her under full anesthesia for over 5 hours mid surgery because the doctor had complications and they wanted to call her doctor about it and then didn't explain that her body would go through menopause from when they took them out (at 35) until she reached 50

[nancypullen]

Fitness or Fatness

Ugh. I'm healthy, at least on paper. I'm in my 60's and don't require any meds to stay alive. I am a shining example of good luck and good genetics. It's certainly not because I am dedicated to fitness or diet. I mean, I try. I just don't try very hard. I eat healthy, but i am also a fan of tasty snacks. I walk for exercise, but not like I should.

Unfortunately, I am at an age where I really need to make some choices that will keep me healthy and mobile for a long time. Odds are that I'll get quite old (the women in my family live forever) and I want to be able to do the things I like. That's pretty much just gardening and shopping, I'm not trying to run marathons or anything, but still. Having said all of that, the mister and I drove over to Centreville today to check out the new YMCA. It's a big, beautiful facility that offers everything from water aerobics to kickboxing. There are plans in place for an outdoor pool as well. We toured the various sections, talked to the sweetest young woman about membership, and I think we're going to give it a whirl. After my ankle surgery a few years ago I used to water jog in the pool of our nearest rec center. It was such great exercise and so easy on my joints, a doctor recommended therapy. At the Y I'd be able to participate in water aerobics or just take an open lane and water jog. Not gonna' lie, the water aerobics appeal to me because the women in those classes are usually such fun. Potential friends? Back in Tennessee it was sure a fun group. now all I have to do is blow the dust off my swimsuits and see if I can still shove everything into place. I may need counseling afterward. The YMCA in Centerville is about 17 miles from our house - mostly through cornfields. This was a nice surprise during the drive. Sunflowers!

Aren't they beautiful? So cheerful. I hesitate to say that my gardens are trying to rally. I still have the world's healthiest tomato plant that has never produced fruit, but everything else is blooming and looking pretty (finally!). My pumpkin plants are thriving and I'm cautiously optimistic. I've just cursed myself, haven't I? At this point I'd sell my soul for one pretty pumpkin for the grandgirl to pick. Crossing my fingers. That's all my news for this Tuesday evening. Not much happens around here. We're on our sofas, watching the U.S. women's gymnastics team dominate at the Olympics. They're flying through the air and flipping and twisting, powered by sculpted muscle. I'm in my stretchy pants saying, "I think she stepped out on that landing..." Yep, might be time for me to get to the Y and build a little muscle myself. But first, a cookie... I hope you're doing something good for yourself. You deserve it, and you'll be glad you did. No one ever said they regretted making healthy choices. Taking care of your body doesn't mean worrying about pant size or numbers on a scale - it's about feeling good, moving well, and being strong. That's priceless. I don't need to have a snatched waist, I need to be able to hike to the Sacre Coeur in Paris. I don't need to be a size 2, I need to be able to run for a train with my bag. Living the life I want has nothing to do with my figure and everything to do with my health. Take this advice from an old crone, younger ladies - focus on what you want to do and not how you want to look. We live in a society determined to convince us that no matter how we look it is never quite good enough, so just ignore that. Sure, slap on your lipstick and a cute outfit, but anchor all of that with how you feel. All the makeup in the world can't compete with the glow of good health. I'll be honest, I haven't felt great since we moved here. Two years of feeling unwell, or just...not like myself. I blamed covid, I blamed menopause, I researched all sorts of supplements, I did everything except take care of myself. It shows. The good news is that it's not too late. I got sweaty on the treadmill this morning and felt better all day long. It truly is that simple, all we have to do is start. Sending out so much love tonight, I hope you feel it. Take care of yourself. Stay safe, stay well. XOXO, Nancy

[persephone-the-witch]

My story:

I'm 40 years old. I was told a decade ago that I wasn't able to have kids. I have Endometriosis, and it's around my cervix. My ex-husband and I tired and tired for a baby, even had IVF. Nothing worked. We ended up getting a divorce because of the after effects and the stress.

I had come to terms that I'd never be a mom, and I was finally content and happy with my life. Going back to college, have a great job. Being a great aunt to my sisters kids. I was happy with my life and where it was going.

I had missed a period, no big deal. I have endometriosis and getting closer to menopause. I thought it was one of those. I was hoping I was finally in menopause. Endometriosis sucks!!! But I thought it was odd, even with those things I should have started my period. I know my body so well, I decided to take a test just to make sure. I've never gotten a positive pregnancy test for a many years as I had tired. It was mainly a ruling out things so I could make a plan for menopause, finally. I didn't think much about it when I was peeing on that stick waiting for it to tell me it's negative. So I didn't think much about it. When I looked at the test it said it was positive!!! I stood in the bathroom for I don't know how long, just in complete and utter shock. This shouldn't be happening. This isn't supposed to happen. I was told I'd never get pregnant. So many thoughts started spinning around in my head. What do I do?! What's happening right now? I couldn't make sense of anything at the time. Everything was coming at me so fast. I think at the time I instantly went numb. Trying to think about what to do, if this was really real.

Called my boyfriend and told him it was positive, he was silent for awhile, just like I was. This was unexpected for him too. Had we known it was a possibility we would have used protection. It wasn't supposed to be a possibility at all. So what happened?

We went and took a test at a clinic after I had taken another test to be sure. Sure enough both mine and the doctors test were all positive. So what do we do next? So swimming thoughts and choices needed to be made. I already knew my choice. I made that choice years ago. It's not like it couldn't have happened when I wanted a baby so badly it hurt.

So, now what? Where do I go? What do I do? Roe vs Wade has been overturned. It's now illegal to get an abortion, I could go to prison. So many thoughts in my head. Knowing we couldn't tell anyone what we were doing. That in of itself is terrifying and trying to keep this life changing decision a secret.

Couldn't drive to a clinic, they were all far away. Looked up the information and cost for medical abortions. I could buy them and have them shipped to me. And that what we did. We waited for the pills to come and made a plan for when they did. I was gonna spend that weekend together. We made his place comfortable and calming. The night I took the first pill, we had a nice dinner and watched a movie. And just spent time together. Just a super chill night together. Knowing what was to come.

We went to bed, snuggled up together. Letting the pill do it's job. Considering everything it was a peaceful sleep. That morning I had went to the bathroom and noticed blood. Ok, so the process has started. It wasn't time yet to take the other pills. So while we were still in the calm before the storm we just enjoyed our time together. Getting everything prepared for our journey.

I was extremely nervous, not knowing what to expect. I had read different options on the pain level. How was I going to feel after this was over. If our relationship could survive this. How was he doing in all this. Being my rock has its own consequences and trauma. Just add it to my list of traumas.

Pain meds, heading pad at the ready. It was time to take the other meds. After I had taken the last of the meds, it wasn't even two hours later, the fight of my bodies life had started. Terrified, angry, sad about the state of the country and women's health-care. That we have to be forced back into the shadows. No woman should ever have to go through that. Alone and sad.

This was my decision, doesn't stop the pain though. The hurt, the sadness, the anger and rage I felt about this situation.

The cramps came, the contractions. That was painful, the tears and anger that poured out of me was unreal. It was like I was having an outer body experience. I was there but wasn't. I distanced myself from it. I would deal with the feelings and things after. Right then I was just trying to survive. I was in so much pain it was hard to move, to walk, do much of anything. Ended up having to almost be carried to the bathroom and back. It was that bad. Moaning in pain on the couch, breathing to help try and control the situation since I had none at the time.

It took until about that evening when the pain was at its highest that I felt our baby leave my body. I knew in that moment that I was no longer pregnant. Relief spread through me at that moment. Sadness wasn't far behind. Second guessing what we did is normal. Doesn't help at the time.

Letting my body do what it needed to do and just be with that knowing you're ok and you did the right thing. Just trying to survive the weekend without completely losing it was a feat in itself.

Weeks after, up to my first period was bleeding, cramps and clots. I'm on my second period and I'm still waiting for my body to do back to normal. The hormones were insane. The hormones finally went away and got a negative pregnancy test at least. I hadn't realized that it felt like I couldn't breathe for months. That weight I was holding finally dropped. I could think and see clearly again. Coming out of the shadows and into my truth,learning and healing are my next adventures.

Almost 10 weeks post abortion. It's time to start healing. ❤️

[antiterf]

Realizing that a big part in getting people to recognize that sex isn't binary is to get them to question what we deem as pathological and come to a conclusion that it's based on social norms as much if not more than the physical/psychological harm of "the condition" and Damn this is gonna be Hard

(Continued rant)

Like, sex is considered binary still despite the obvious variation because we pathologize said variation. Not only with bodies we see as intersex but with shit like gynecomastia and hirsutism. The reaction that transphobes get to hrt is legit "those are side effects" when 1. It's called an intended effect, it's why I'm taking the drug, a side effect can be anything outside the intended effect and 2. This reaction comes after I get excited about how the phenotype can change this drastically and it shows how our bodies are somewhat flexible when it comes to sex, even if you're otherwise dyadic.

There are issues that are more common for intersex people depending on the variant. But there are also more issues in men vs women and vice versa on a part of sex.

Like, estrogen decreases the levels of uric acid, making gout in pre-menopausal women unlikely. We can assume then that more estrogen in men can also have a protective role, even if the levels are "abnormal." We don't say that being on the binary male side has side effects, though. We recognize that some bodies are naturally different.

And I can say all of that, and there will still be people saying "this doesn't sound right," which is honestly fine. It's how I come about stuff, too, and I need to sit with myself and ask why before I can really put words to it. I know not everyone is like that, though, so they kind of just go "that's stupid" and move on. Which I also do if I don't care, but if you're going to argue against it, you should care enough to think through it.

And just- it's so much sociological bullshit (complimentary) that the average person can look at like it's too much. But to the people who live through it, it's not too much. It's something that's impacted some of them the moment they were born, and it's important! It's something that impacts all of us on some level, even if our priority needs to be on those it harms the most. The human body is so variant in so many different ways, yet we can barely accept it in most of its variance.

[thegeminisage]

it's tng update time.

we did. and you know this. because i made. i counted. 18 posts about it. "half a life." and of course: "the host" (honorific).

half a life: part of what makes the ep after this so wonderful is that THIS episode was so genuinely upsetting. it was a huge bummer. it was awful. the only fucking episode lwaxana troi has been in that cathy actually watched and she had a valid character arc. i was furious. and then we got into it and i was like. oh.

first of all, kudos to charles winchester from mash for being here. cathy caught a 4077 ref that i missed bc i wasnt paying attention. i cant believe he was gay when he did this

secondly. the fucking. ethical implications of. people who are infirm should be dead for their children's sake and for their own sake. like it's better to be dead than in a nursing home. when you're 60 time's up. parents care for their children so children should care for their parents. your aging parents are mortal and they'll die one day. your daughter wants you to kill yourself. you want to die and can't wait to kill yourself. you don't want to live and then you do want to live but you still have to kill yourself. you're 60. you're 60. YOUR DAUGHTER WANTS YOU TO KILL YOURSELF. when she is 60 your daughter WILL ALSO KILL HERSELF.

i think the most fucked up part of this was that lwaxana ruined him. she meant well, and for once i saw her point and her arguments as totally valid (i usually think she's horrible), it was like maybe the only semi-selfless thing she's ever done aside from the ferengi business we will not be discussing. but she ruined him. when he was fine with dying and he had to die, fine and whatever. when he wanted to live?? no longer fine. if he lives his people will hate him forever. his daughter will regret him living because he can't be laid to rest in the family plot. because he can't die with his friends and family surrounding him. but he's 60. people live to be well over a hundred in the star trek universe, other aliens live even longer. he's SIXTY. he's healthy. he has work to do. a planet to save. and he's gonna die knowing his work meant nothing and his planet might die and his grandson may have nowhere to grow up. live or die, he will be miserable either way, just because he was introduced to a different way of life. it's SO fucked up

i think i had more to say about this after it ended but i have clean forgotten all of it. like it's been blasted out of my memory which is probably for the best. the short version is, i am living at home taking care of my mother who turned 58 three days ago. i didn't need any of that.

but then.

But Then.

the host: what can i possibly. i mean. the sheer. the fucking

like the fucking MOOD WHIPLASH alone

i had heard of this episode years ago. so i knew beverly's bf was a parasite and he eventually jumped into a woman and i was made to believe she was super homophobic about it. i was prepared to look completely past all of this and enjoy not-quite-gay SUBTEXT. i was NOT prepared for ANY of the rest of it

to get this out of the way: as i said, though i miss wesley very much (ask catherine i say so like every episode) it's so fortunate that he was not here. i think bev finally hit menopause because her horny levels were CRITICALLY off the charts and this whole debacle would have been so awkward for him. i'm glad he sent her a letter god bless i'm so glad he's fine wherever he is

the BABY BUMP THIS GUY HAD. this i was not expecting. i didn't know we were doing pregnant men in this episode. i figured the entire episode would be about beverly being like "this is weird cuz idw fuck you now that you're a woman" i had no idea his ass would jump into RIKER

riker did amazing bg work in this ep too before he got to star. he gave beverly and her bf some KNOWING looks. at one point the following exchange was uttered: "HE knows they're fucking." "yeah he wishes it was him." apollo and the dodgeball.....

the fact that after that i literally did have the thought "yeah except he'd never fuck beverly. she's one of the few people who are off limits." lisa simpson dot jpg

and then riker's pregnancy, what can one say. beverly put a little worm in his body. i'm only sad we didn't get to see the baby bump because that would have been extremely funny

i spent the whole ep thinking no way can beverly fuck riker. they have to work together. she has to look him in the eye after this. AND THEN THEY DID.

like it's so insane. it's not even that i dislike the concept because the fallout could lead to some extremely meaty interpersonal drama except for the fact that star trek generally isn't about interpersonal drama and we didn't see riker again after he got possessed. we didn't get one word from him. the silence seems so calculated so as to avoid having to write his reaction. BUT I WANTED HIS REACTION. will he not tell us how it feels to be possessed and pregnant and FUCKING BEVERLY CRUSHER? genuinely this is the first time i've been tempted to look up tng fic. someone tell me there is fic

also, like, he only had 18 hours until he got a new body. she could have waited to fuck the new guy if she felt weird about it being riker. SHE didn't know the knew guy was gonna be a woman. like it had to be menopause

the fact that deanna condoned this, even suggested it, is INSANE. not only because she didn't consider riker's ability, or lack of ability, to consent, but because THAT'S HER BOYFRIEND. quasi-boyfriend. sometimes exes sometimes fwb. like it's NUTS.

their discussion was so wild too. like "what do i miss...his hands, his mouth...no, there was more than that" girl they were 5 more minutes away from discovering the split attraction model. actually i don't even normally like the split attraction model but this episode made me like it a little more. growth <3

actually on that subject quasi-exes are weirdly chill with each other on this show. picard and beverly are kinda dating and kinda not, the same way deanna and riker kind of are and kind of aren't. and picard is like...beverly whatever else i am to you i'm also your friend and i know this fucking sucks. do you want a hug. like that is SO chill and cool of him. and ik they probably do this bc they don't want to have to maintain character development but it winds up accidentally feeling really refreshing

anyway: The Woman

i can't believe that beverly can fuck riker, her "sort of "brother," but not this hot blonde lady. and i know it's because they can't be gay but ACTUALLY

i was SHOCKED that gender didn't come into it at all. like yes it was the elephant in the room but nowhere in beverly's dialogue did she say she couldn't do this because odan was a woman now. copypasting:

"Perhaps it is a human failing, but we are not accustomed to these kinds of changes. I can't keep up. How long will you have this host? What would the next one be? I can't live with that kind of uncertainty. Perhaps, someday, our ability to love won't be so limited."

NONE OF THAT MENTIONS GENDER. none!!! the only part that could be interpreted as a gender thing was when beverly said bring HIM in, and was smiling bc she was about to meet the new version of her bf, only for her smile to drop when she encountered a woman. you could sort of read it as "a woman will be even weirder than riker and i just don't have it in me to go through that acclimation process again" BUT LIKE. like she's CHOOSING not to. not that she couldn't eventually adjust. to a woman. beverly just found out she's bisexual fr

like the wrist kiss was SO SENSUAL. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. i can't believe they let two women do that on tv in 1991. holy shit. AND!!! they said i love you to each other. i did quite literally stand up out of my seat. it feels very progressive considering when it was written

and like it's a shame this was in the same episode where riker gets knocked up bc that distracted from the entire gay thing. i WISH the whole episode had been odan in a woman's body and riker had had his own episode to do all of that in later. like it would've been incredible. sexuality is fluid <3

anyway. wow. next time: "the mind's eye" and "in theory," two episodes i already feel sorry for because they will Never live up to all of that.

[initiala]

I’ve been dying at all the memes of girls being drafted and the comments are so fucking stupid like a) it’s just funny, shut up, I would absolutely hit the curb/a car if I had to drive a tank, I drive an SUV and some days the drivers in MD make it terrifying bumper cars, and b) y’all really just don’t know what you want do you? “Oh men have to get drafted why don’t women have to get drafted” *the concept is seriously introduced* “WIMMIN DONT BELONG IN THE MILITARYYYYY” go eat a pack of lead pencils, dumb fuck, women have been in the military for a couple of generations now, and the reason a draft would now include them is because there’s ACTUALLY jobs for them to do now. Women weren’t needed for the Vietnam draft, the 11,000 that went were really only serving as nurses.

It’s the same people who are like “a woman can’t be president, what if she gets her period and fires nukes”. I mean, first of all, the age of the woman we’d be electing is going to mean she’s menopausal. So really, what we’d have to worry about is the astronomical a/c bills for the Oval Office when she gets hot flashes. Tax payer dollars at work.

Second of all, you actually probably want young women all being synced up on their periods in a squadron. The unbridled rage and hate that fills a 20-year old woman from being sexualized since she was 11? Remembering her douchebag boyfriend from sophomore year? Now give her the excuse and a machine gun. And multiply her by 10. She’s gonna cry after, but she deserves it.

[elliwesis]

Additionally I never experienced any premenstral symptoms until after I got pregnant and had a kid. I would track my cycles because it was extremely reliable so my only warning was a notification from my tracker app. I was aware that other people experienced other symptoms and the tracker app has the ability to track them but until I got pregnant in my mid 20s my first heads up was warning cramps half an hour before debilitating ones. Since I’ve had my kid, I’ve acquired premenstral symptoms. Lower back pain the entire week before? Who thought that was a good idea? And then those three days prior when I get grumpy. It’s not depression but I’m very much inpatient and unsocial and the first time I experienced it I didn’t know what it was. It was just a persistent mood that disappeared as soon as my period started and the second I had a clear head I wrote it off as a bad few days. It took two or three more periods post child before I realized it kept happening and I marked it and now when the lower back pain hits I know my hormones gonna make me a generally awful person to be around and I have to consciously be like “that’s upsetting me because of the hormones it’s literally a minor inconvenience that I’d fix and forget on a normal day.” So not only do premenstral symptoms need to be more understood and talked about but also that they can change as your body changes (again pregnancy but also maybe just getting older I may have just been took young for the lower back pain to plague me). Considering the menstrual cycle affects our lives from the time it starts and even after it ends, we enter menopause the lack of it affects our lives. It’s ridiculous that period education is like “here’s some pads, take medicine if it hurts, don’t make it other people’s problem it usually ends in your mid 40s to early 50s, goodluck.” But it’s so so so much more and it should be taught at a young age so people know what’s normal and what’s not normal and can get help when they need it.

Pre-menstrual depression is always depicted as like "He He! I had a box of icecream bars and cried while watching the Titanic!" But in reality, it's more like, "I'm standing the edge of an abyss. There is nothing good inside of me, I'm filled with rage and desperation."

It's crazy that being told how to deal with that is never a part of anyone's menstrual sex education.

[jodilin65]

Gonna update daily once again. I had forgotten that I share these entries to FB and Tumblr is harder to backdate as opposed to LJ.

As I've always said, if there were a god, it would have to be pretty damn misogynistic to allow women to go through all we go through. But for one such womanly problem called menopause, I am now armed with estrogen cream. It does come with a few risks, and I'm only using it three days a week. It would still be nice if these foreign pharmacists and other healthcare workers would take the time and patience to adopt our accent so I could understand them, but nonetheless, as I was reading off the list of potential side effects on the way home, I had to laugh at the one that mentioned gallbladder issues. Well, I certainly don't have to worry about that one!

Fortunately, serious side effects are rare, and most people like it. It not only helps with burning but also with atrophy. Tom did some research for me (just so he could be in the know if anything went wrong) so I wouldn’t get too obsessed with my medication phobia—even if it's topical—and focus too much on potential problems. He said there were tons of other women who said they thought they had UTIs when they started burning down there and also had trouble with applicators, which got easier after just a few days. I have to use a gram at a time, so I can’t just dab a little bit on my fingertip and shove it up there. If I’m going to go that route, I have to fill the applicator up to a gram and then keep dabbing until it’s empty. The first time around, however, I managed to get enough of it up there—at least I think I did. Perhaps not as deep as I should have, but it’s a start. Hopefully, I won’t have any annoying side effects. It’s still a hormone, after all. Unfortunately, I know all too well exactly what kind of hell those things can bring. One of them sits in a bottle on my kitchen counter.

I’m utterly exhausted today, and part of it is my own dumb fault. I decided to try that Restaze, and with just half a dose—thank God I didn’t take a whole one—I woke up extremely hungover. That’s a common side effect, along with headaches ( I had a slight one) and vivid dreams. It’s got melatonin in it, which can do that, and which I’m sensitive to, so again, I should have known better. I woke up a million times and just couldn’t get comfortable despite having an incredibly comfortable bed—like the best bed I ever had. As fragmented as my sleep was, at least I wasn’t up for too long at a time. Clonazepam before bed tonight is a must!

I’ve got to keep away from all sleep aids and antihistamines except for Claritin. I haven’t even taken that or the nasal spray in a few days, and I haven’t gotten any worse. 

I’m still trying not to worry about how long it may be before I get a CPAP and whether it’s going to help. I would absolutely be devastated if I got it, got used to it, but found it wasn’t energizing me. What am I supposed to do then? Wait until the sleep issues kill me? I don’t think I can just lay around until it takes its toll on my brain and body—and I really believe it will if it isn’t resolved soon enough. I’m forced to spend too much time in bed and unable to do all the things I want to do. I haven’t been able to do any cleaning today, and even cooking is out unless it’s something quick and easy. 

I forced myself to go with him to Walgreens to pick up my prescription, hoping the sunlight would help, but it didn’t. So while he’s lying down, resting up to donate tomorrow—since he’s going to be seeing an optometrist on Friday, which is when he normally donates—I’m resting up because I am simply fatigued as hell and drained of energy. He’s seeing the one we last saw and didn’t like but it’s the only one available before September that’s covered by his plan which kind of sucks.

Exhausted or not, I have a lot to get in print, and I didn’t want to put it off any longer and get even more backed up. I’m so grateful for speech-to-text! It would be a lot harder if I had to write all this out. Honestly, I can’t believe there are that many people these days who would bother to do that. If that’s your thing, fine, but to me, that’s just so old school.

It’s now been just over 50 hours since my tooth was pulled, and it’s healing nicely. The dentist called a few hours after I got home the day it was pulled but I was resting, and by then, it was after 6:00, so the place was closed. She just said she hoped I was doing okay and to call if I had any problems.

Tom read a disturbing article about there being a connection between older women with excessive fatigue and sleepiness and a link to dementia. I’m already at risk of that, and sometimes I wonder and worry if I could have early-onset dementia. God, I hope not! According to research, if I do—and I’m not going to bother getting tested because it’s pretty involved, time-consuming, and probably costly—I should remain independent in my 60s, but after that, it might be like being a kid all over again. No thanks!

I started Centrum Silver multivitamins for women over 50 today, so I’m hoping that may help give me some energy, but I don’t know. Here I am in a place ten times quieter than the last one, and I’m sleeping worse! Way worse. I still feel like my quest for proper sleep and energy is a losing battle. I feel like the more I chase it, the further away it gets, and I’m simply wasting time struggling for what isn’t meant to be. That’s why I totally believe that if the CPAP doesn’t help and I’ve exhausted all other avenues, it will be time to seriously consider exiting Hotel Earth. I want to live—not simply exist. The worst thing it could be is chronic fatigue, and that’s still a very real fear of mine.

For the hell of it, when I saw it advertised in my Facebook feed, I decided to sign up on a site called Mentla. They offer free AI therapy. It may sound funny in itself, but they swear it was created by real therapists and has proven to be helpful. So I went through their catalog of therapists. There’s about a half-dozen women and a half-dozen men of all different ages and races. I chose Sophie. They say it will always be free, even though they do have paid options. Fifteen minutes a day is enough for me, though. Besides, there’s still Copilot, Chat, Replika, Matey, etc.

Ray left a few days ago, but unfortunately, the Honker is still here. Haven’t heard much from him other than the usual loud honk his truck makes. I doubt he’ll leave before the middle of the month.

Using my points from my insurance company, I got a 3-inch Himalayan salt lamp. Although there isn’t much scientific evidence to back it up, there are claims that it’s good for you physically and emotionally. It boosts the mood and cleans the air.

I almost got a book on calisthenics, but again, I’m so damn fatigued so much of the time I can’t take on any new workout program other than my VR travels and even that’s limited. I only did a few miles yesterday, and I’m not getting on the road today at all. So I’m going to be stuck in Poland for quite a while!

Got a new sippy cup. I like to keep the ones with built-in straws by the bed if I wake up thirsty. The silicone one I got was absolutely horrible because as I sucked on it, it squeezed itself shut. I still can’t use straws until tomorrow when it’s been 72 hours after the extraction. Ugh, not even here four years and I’ve already lost one organ and two teeth!

I also got a color-by-number coloring book called Wanderlust with various scenes around the world. Because I got some white-out, I want to see if I can white out some of the numbers. I won't have to with darker colors, though. Hopefully, it won't leave any raised spots that will show through. Fortunately, this book has very light, small numbers, unlike that patterns coloring book I got from China through Temu.

When I went to open the package with my gemstones, I first thought they sent me the wrong stone because I saw a dark color. But when I pulled it out, I found that they were nice enough to add a cute little small heart-shaped amethyst along with the clear quartz with the thumb indentation that I ordered, and that’s already sitting in my robe pocket. I just won't be wearing it much until the end of the year. It's 90° today, so summer is in full swing.

My newfound cyber friend, Melanie, is absolutely amazing! What a talent! As I mentioned, she said she sensed energy emitting from Jade. She's my 32-inch porcelain doll that I bought as a kid and put together myself (a bit poorly), but nonetheless, I got her at the end of 1999.

I also got the same exact EMF reader she uses in some of her amazing and interesting videos. I've only used it on a few dolls so far, and I have to move them away from outlets and electronics, which will trigger the thing to light up. None of the dolls reacted except for—guess who? Yeah, you guessed it… Jade! Now the question is, why? Is it because there really is an entity living in her? And if so, what/who is it?

I don't have Melanie's talent, so I have a lot to learn. Remember, I'm just the premonitioner and influencer. Assuming she is haunted by a person who lived and speaks English, I guess the next step would be to set up a pendulum, gather various gemstones, and do the same thing I saw Melanie doing in her video. I'm grateful for that video, too, because I wouldn’t know what the hell to do otherwise! I'm totally new to this. Once I have a very elusive thing called energy, I'll see if I can instruct it to make the same motions with the pendulum when I ask questions.

Before I wrap up this long entry, last night's very vivid dreams—brought to you by Restaze—featured a doctor asking me if the baby was giving me trouble.

"What baby?" I asked him.

He looked at my stomach and said, "Well, you're kind of far along, aren't you?"

I looked at him incredulously and said, "At 59? Are you serious, man?"

Then, I later asked Tom if he thought the doctor was out of his mind or if I was so fat that I looked like I could be knocked up. Unfortunately, he seemed to think the latter, LOL.

It gets better.

In the second dream, he was knocked up! Yes, Tom was positively pregnant, although I have no idea how. He seemed to be amazed by it and said, "Imagine how big this already big belly of mine is going to be."

I told him that I hated to burst his bubble of joy, but he needed to get rid of it because, at his age, it would kill him.

"You can't do that here," he said.

To that, I said, "We can do whatever we want."

In the last Restaze dream, I don’t know why, but I was in a wheelchair. The deal was that at home, I could walk around all I wanted, but when out in public, I had to be in the wheelchair. So Tom was pushing me around, and we were in some fairly crowded building. He wanted to use the men's room, so he left me in a room with a few obnoxious people talking loudly. I pushed my chair away from them, realizing it was the first time I had wheeled myself around on my own, but I quickly got the feel of it.